Already / Not Yet: The Follow-Up

Per a suggestion from a friend, here's the update on the "Already / Not Yet" post from just over a month ago.  You might think they'd all be done by now... but not quite:

ALREADY
Have Internet
      - This was a huge win and help around the house!
Gotten work visa approved
       - Per the UK Home Office, we can officially stay 3 years now!
Gotten rid of the straggling fleas
       - This was the biggest win for Ginger's sanity.
Unboxed everything
       - Well, essentially at least.  Anything still in a box is supposed to stay there.
Kids started in school
       - And they love it (except the "every day" thing, per Liam)
Gotten heat turned on in office
       - I can work there now and not see my breath!
Played my guitar for Club
      - It's fun to hear the kids sing, and "The Banana Song" is a must.

Ginger delivered the baby
       - See previous post.

Figured out the middle school weekend retreat
      - More on that in a post to come, but it went great, and was beautiful, as seen here:

SORT-OF / PARTIAL
Understand the best way to manage two accounts in the States and two in the UK
      - It's getting easier, but still confusing at times.
Have a washer, dryer, dishwasher
       - Still no dishwasher, unless you include "my hands".
Bought boys’ bunk beds, vacuum, TV, lamps
       - Still no bunk beds.  Nothing wrong with mattresses on the floor when you're a kid!

STILL NOT YET
Gotten clearance to use the military computers (i.e. the computer in my office)
       - It's kinduva inconvenience to always have to email files to Sgt. Wilson
          for her to print for me, but she loves to be helpful and is super efficient!

Registered Chris and the boys for healthcare
       - It's a lot of paperwork.

Ginger gotten her drivers’ license
       - Something about a baby has taken precedence.

Sold our house back home
       - Pray for this one.  It sure would be nice to have this one done.

Visited Highclere Castle
       - We'll do this one day.

Met the Queen
      - We'll do this probably never.

Gotten a speeding ticket on British roads
      - We'll do this hopefully never.

Eaten bangers and mash
     - We're in no rush to do this.

Full House

November 15th is the latest of November birthdays that the Nichols family will be celebrating!

Evangeline Malcolm Nichols showed up at 1:29 am, and clocked in at a substantial 9 lbs 15 oz.  (Already she's trying to keep up with her brothers: Eli was 10 lbs and Liam 9 lbs 5 oz).  She joins her aunt Lissa, brother Eli, aunt Charmaine, late great Grandmom Malcolm, and Papa among our November birthdays!

 

 (Warning: This next section will only be of interest/relevance to parents who have been a part of the "birth in a hospital" thing.  The rest of you, skip on ahead, for your own sake....)

Giving birth in a U.K. hospital is considerably different than in a U.S. hospital.  They generally have a more "hands off" approach.  No hook-up to a monitor.  No cm dilation check.  Epidurals are available but seem rare.  For pain, they offer an "air and gas" breathing mask (i.e. nitrous oxide) for the mum to use at her discretion.  They just kinda let things go their course.  When Ginger asked (or perhaps "yelled" is a better verb) if it was okay to start to push, their answer was "Whenever you're ready... oh, I see the head crowning... you can go ahead, dearie."  After she was born, there maybe was an Apgar test, but we never heard for sure.  Most of the meconium fountain that came out when she was born was cleaned up... most.  Evangeline had a nominal wipe-down, was given to Ginger wrapped loosely in a couple of hospital towels.  No diapers provided, you're on your own for those. The nurse and midwife then rolled out with a lovely "Call us if you need us!"  The baby is never taken from you, you're just expected to parent and ask for help if you need it....  We were SO glad we had done this a couple times before, otherwise we would have been freaking out!

As far as the stay itself, we checked in at midnight, and Evangeline was born by 1:30 am.  They moved Ginger from the labour ward to the maternity ward at 6:30am... and kicked me out!  Spouses can't come back to visit until 9:30am.  Absolutely NO other visitors until 6:30pm.  The pediatrician stopped by in the morning (who was Nigerian and had a lovely accent!), and the nurses briefly popped by a couple times, but that was it.  We then realized: "There's no reason to stay here longer."  After a brief delay for some bloodwork results and paperwork, we checked out same day at 4:30pm... only 16.5 hours after showing up! 

So we now have a British citizen to round out our "full house" of three boys and two girls.  Eli and Liam were super excited to meet and welcome their baby sister.  Soon after her arrival, Eli went and scooped up a bunch of things, sat down in front of her, and began to display one item at a time: "Lego... Lego....   Book.... book....  Daddy, look, I am teaching the baby new words!"  After a couple of weeks, her charm hasn't worn off, but reality has set in; at one dinner Eli said: "Mommy, having a baby is a lot harder work than I was expecting."  Liam has observed: "She's kinda loud sometimes."  My reply was: "You're one to talk."

Several have asked about her name.  You're welcome to pronounce it as you like, but we're going with eh-vange-a-leen (as opposed to LIN or LINE or LINOLEUM... ha!).  We picked it because it means "bearer of good news," which is both what she was to us, as well as what we are striving to do with teenagers.  

People have also asked what we're going to call her... call me crazy, but I'm calling her "Evangeline".  Some of the nicknames being bandied about now by others are "Em" (her initials) or "Evie".  

(For those musically inclined, I think you can call her Al, or call her Maybe.)

    

So far Evangeline is doing great!  At our appointments, the midwife - who makes house calls, another new adjustment for us - has been pleased with both Ginger and baby's progress.  Evangeline has even gained another full pound!  She's also already visited Ely (pictured below), ridden the Tube, and "seen" the Tower of London!  We're excited about the new adventures ahead for the Nichols family... we just need a super hero nickname for the newest Unbelievable!

Already / Not Yet

And just like that, we’ve been in England for five weeks.  We’ve certainly started a new life in many different ways, and have been working on adjusting our expectations, lifestyles, and culture accordingly.  One of the biggest lessons learned has been “Everything takes longer here.”  And that’s everything: travel, deliveries, getting approvals/clearances, cell phone data speed, shopping, restaurants/fast food, finding a place to park... you get the idea.

One quick way to summarize all the progress we’ve made, as well as all we have left to do, can be captured by one of my favorite theological ideas: the “Already / Not Yet”.  The idea is that by what Christ has achieved on the cross, some things have “already” happened (sins forgiven, we’re called his children, etc.) but some things are “not yet” (all tears wiped away, evil destroyed, etc.).  So with that, now that we’ve been in England for awhile, here’s the list of the “Nichols’ Already / Not Yet” for our first five weeks…

Already (have or done)                              Not Yet

Adjusted to our time zone                            Ever feel like we get enough sleep

Got military IDs                                               Gotten clearance to use the military

                                                                                   computers (i.e. the computer in my office)

Started a sterling and a dollars                  Understand the best way to manage two  

         bank accounts here                                      accounts in the States and two in the UK

Registered Ginger for healthcare               Registered Chris and the boys for healthcare

Filled out paperwork for kids’ school      Kids started in school

Submitted work visa application               Gotten work visa approved

Found a house                                                  Gotten rid of the straggling fleas

Gotten our stuff from the States                 Unboxed everything

Have heat, power, water in the house       Have Internet

Got a fridge, microwave                                Have a washer, dryer, dishwasher

Cleaned out office                                           Gotten heat turned on in office

Bought a car and a minivan                         Ginger gotten her drivers’ license

Sold our cars back home                              Sold our house back home

Bought a GPS, hair clippers                          Bought boys’ bunk beds, vacuum, TV, lamps

Ginger had doctor appointments               Ginger delivered the baby

Visited London and Cambridge                  Visited Highclere Castle (Downton Abbey)

Met the Colonel (base commander)          Met the Queen

Gotten a speeding ticket on base               Gotten a speeding ticket on British roads

Eaten fish and chips                                       Eaten bangers and mash

Played bass for Sunday worship                Played my guitar for Club

Run 8 Clubs and 5 Bible studies                Figured out the middle school weekend

                                                                                  retreat next month

Getting Established

Our first week at Alconbury was a blur of activity, orientation, coping from jet lag, meeting new people, and diving straight into ministry.  Stephanie Hardy (pictured left) was the outgoing Community Director.  She did a great job of welcoming us and filling us in on everything we needed to know... sometimes to the point of information overload! 

She introduced us to the Bowling Center: not just a place to bowl, but a popular lunch hangout with a full menu.  (Our boys had to get in game too.)  In the weeks since, I've already been here several times to meet kids for lunch.  The high schoolers can leave school for their lunch break, and it's a short walk to the Bowling Center.

We have been housed on the base in the TLF (Temporary Living Facility), which is basically a hotel, each suite with a bedroom, small kitchen and a living room.  Cozy and liveable!  It's been especially nice because there are a couple other families with young boys that have become friends to Eli and Liam and a nice playground just outside!  We were also blessed by some beautiful weather our first few weeks in England.

Our first Club (pictured) was Tuesday, the day after we arrived!  It was cool to dive right in with meeting kids and leaders.  Tuesdays are full days: the middle school kids come over to the chapel annex right after school for snacks, then it's middle school Club, then high school dinner, then high school Club! The next night was my first Wednesday night Bible study with both the middle and high school kids.  I was encouraged by the small group that showed up and with their interest and questions.  We've started studying the book of Mark, but I anticipate a number of healthy "rabbit trails" of topics of discussion as we go week-to-week!

The hardest part of week one (as well as since then) has been adjusting to different life, and a different pace of life.  The slogan I often repeat is "Everything just takes longer here."  Sometimes it's due to the military culture.  Sometimes it's the British culture.  Sometimes it's just our own unfamiliarity or insecurity!  For instance, to do ANYTHING on base we needed an ID card, which I didn't get until then end of our first week.  Which meant we couldn't shop on base, start a bank account, get a cell phone, go on/off base by ourselves, buy groceries, get our PO box... You get the idea.

But we've learned a lot since then, and (sometimes) things are moving faster now.  We've met lots of great people at the chapel and feel well taken care of.  We're excited to see what God does in our lives and with kids on base as we go forward!

A Tale of the Travel Day (in photos)

  The adventure started in Grayson, GA, as Andrew and Hilary so generously offered to drive us to the International terminal at Hartsfield in Atlanta.  We left their house around 6:15pm.  About four minutes later, Liam was already out, and slept all the way to the airport.  (Note: This wasn't a good thing.)













After we got there, the slow meltdowns began.  Liam was grumpy about being woken up. Eli was tired. The British Airways check-in line was about 3.2 miles long.  We were SO thankful to have good friends who waited with us and helped with the kids!   We spent a while in line desperately trying to find the children's Benadryl we packed for the journey.  We searched every bag... but never found it.  You can see below how frazzled Ginger was, how unamused I was, how tired Eli was, and how patient Andrew (and Hilary) were!

 Once we got to check-in, everything improved.  Never-Shy Liam made a new friend, and we found out how accurate the Wii-Fit was to weigh all of our bags.  ALL of them were right on 23.0 kgs - the max allowed without overage charges! Whoop whoop!

We were a comical sight with our many bags, pregnant waddle, and sleepy boys; but we made it to the gate, got pajamas on, and life was good.  The boys were super excited about being on the plane and it wasn't long before they were asleep.

 BUT Liam didn't sleep super great.  So he was awake a lot (as was Ginger, who had to walk around often - y'know, being pregnant and all).  She watched two and a half movies, and Liam got to see most of Monsters U again.














Not surprisingly, Liam was tired through border crossing and customs, and kept wanting to lay down.  Eli was a trooper, and kept trying to help.  God was gracious to us through customs - the line was rather long, but after waiting only about 5 minutes, an agent approached me: "Are you with the pregnant lady?"  I am.  "Follow me."  She led us to the front of the line, and we were through pretty quickly.  Hooray!

Eli's picture to the right is his first official picture in England!  The picture at the bottom is the 4 metric kilotons of stuff we brought on the plane.
... And now the REAL adventure begins!

Figuring it out

One of the challenges in this move is helping the boys to understand not just where we're moving but WHY.  Though Eli wasn't initially too excited about the idea of selling our house, they've been excited for some time now about moving to the land of Mary Poppins, and where they can see "that big clock tower."

On our last night in our house, I opted to read them the first story of Abraham (or Abram at the time, for purists).  We talked about moving with your family to a country you've never seen, just because God wants you to.  We talked about how it's scary and exciting and hard, all at the same time.  But Abraham did it, and we're going to do it, because for some reason God chose him (and us) to do something that would help more people know about him.

So at the end, I asked them what they thought about us moving to England to "go tell military kids about Jesus"...  Liam said: "Hey Dad!  We could call England - Canaan!"   Well... that's not quite as figured out as I hoped, but close enough. 

And I told Liam: "That's a great idea... but we're not really going to do that..."

Leaving

To pack up one's family for 3 (or more) years to head overseas, leaving a place you've been for a decade is quite the emotional process.  It's tough to know "how" to say goodbye to people.  Do I act like "Oh I'll see just see you soon"?  Or is it "I may never see you again"?  Or "Wow, we've shared a lot of life together"? Or... or... or...

Some farewells were more tearful than others.  Some we just pretended it was another day.   Some we didn't get to do at all.

We were blessed to be able to get to see almost everyone "one last time" over the course of July and August.  Our travels took us to Louisiana (above) to Tennessee and to as far as Columbia, Missouri to see all our our family members. Friends threw us get-togethers in Thomasville, at church, and even two in Atlanta the weekend we were leaving.  And we even got to eat our last meal in T-ville at our favorite place with some of our favorite people.



God has used this process to reveal to me how gracious he has been in our lives.  We have been blessed with countless dear friends and family members, about whom there isn't enough room on this blog to write about.  It's been humbling to hear from these folks how much they love us, appreciate us, and will miss us.  It's almost kinda shocking, actually.

It's a great picture of what the body of Christ is about.  He has showered his unconditional love and grace upon us, welcomed us in, and made us a part.  We don't deserve it, we can only be amazed at what we've received and live in thankfulness out of it.  In a similar way, we don't deserve the family and friends we've received, but as we go forward - even though we may not get to see them as often - we know we are a part of their lives and are thankful for them. 

Go Time

We're cleared to go!  We've bought our one-way tickets to England and leave September 15th!  The next two weeks will be busy with packing, sorting, getting an international moving company, saying goodbyes, and much more.  We will be in Thomasville until the 13th, then head to Atlanta for the weekend, and fly out Sunday night, arriving Monday morning....   Here we go!

August Happenings

Eli started kindergarten, and being the social kid he is, was pretty excited about it.  He'll only get about a month and a half of U.S. school before heading to England and being in "Year One" as they call it, but it's been great for him!   Liam is going to preschool at First Baptist during the mornings.  It's been a good window of time for Ginger to get things done for the move!

Our family made the week-long marathon trip from Georgia to Tennessee to Missouri and back to see (and say goodbye to) family!  We covered a lot of physical ground, but also got to see both my parents, both Ginger's parents, her sister & brother-in-law, ten aunts/uncles/cousins/grandma on her mom's side of the family, and almost everyone on her dad's side of the family!   It was great to see everyone, and we pretty much just tried not to think about "this is the last time we're going to see you for a looong time...".

I worked on wrapping up everything with Young Life in Thomasville, which was hard to do after a decade here!  But had some great moments too, include Nathan's farewell/graduation party (left) and continuing our Campaigners (Bible study) group with the high school guys.  My last official day as Area Director was Aug. 15, and I'm now on the international YL Military payroll!

  And in the "Is That Really You?" category, there's the picture to the right.  I was invited to come to the march last Sunday for the 50th anniversary of MLK's "I Have a Dream" speech  so Young Life was represented (which was an honor!)  The flyer said to wear a t-shirt of your representing organization, and I did.  What it *didn't* say is that all ministers and leaders would be coming up front to lead the march.  Can you spot me in the picture?...  (Hint: I'm wearing light blue).  Though I was quite under-dressed, the good news is that I was totally welcomed, and Jeremy (the minister in charge) insisted that it didn't matter what I was wearing.  It was great to be a part of supporting the community on that day.

Transitioning

One of the big things talked about in our cross-cultural training to get ready for the move is how difficult "transitioning" is.  This is the straight-forward term for the phase of physically and emotionally preparing to leave before moving and adjusting to your new culture.

Though we're still (probably) two months from leaving, I've discovered transitioning can indeed be challenging.  It's life filled with perpetual questions - sometimes easy, sometimes hard - that daily we're having to try to answer.  

How much smaller will our new house be? 
  Where do I get so many cardboard boxes? 
     Where should we store our stuff?  Who should I give this other stuff to? 
       When can we see all our family "one last time" before leaving?
How is there enough time to see friends "one last time" before leaving?
    How do I sort through "sad I'm leaving" with "happy about the new excitement ahead"?
       Am I going to ever see this person again?  How should I act about that?
           How do I answer all my kids' questions?
               How do I answer all MY questions?

You get the idea.  But as I was sorting through this the other day, praying about it all, trying to give it to God (and not take it back), I was struck with this question and realization: 

What if I had to do all of this every two or three years?...  
                                          That is exactly what military kids go through.

It really brought perspective on what we're going through, but more so, what we're going to go do.  Military kids don't think about transitioning as much, simply because it's a way of life for them.  These big questions and big emotions they just have to cope with.  Maybe someone will help them deal with it, maybe they won't.  

My prayer is that all that God teaches me through this process, he will use to help me empathize with these teenagers, and love them well through it.

Return of the Jedi

We have big news!  It is with great joy that we recently found out of all the places we could be deployed in Europe, we've been assigned to RAF Alconbury in Cambridgeshire, England when we head overseas. This is the same base where I lived when I was Eli and Liam's age while my dad served there for three years . What a privilege to come full circle and be able to do ministry where I lived as a boy! It will be exciting to see my boys making memories on the same base I did.

I have a lot of fun memories from there: walking to kindergarten and having my cats follow me to school... getting stuck in a bentwood rocking chair.... a bird flying in our house and causing my mom to freak out.... But one memory in particular stands out...

In 1977, my dad took me as an almost 5 yr old to see a movie that captured my imagination.... Star Wars.  I remember sitting through what felt like HOURS of bad British commercials and film shorts before finally being transported to a universe with light sabers, talking droids, and Obi Wan Kenobi. Throughout my childhood (and yes, admittedly, adulthood), I was a huge fan of the Star Wars story and characters, and to some extent, became a part of who I was. 

Now as a parent, it's been fun to see my boys be captured by the same story, playing with the same toy figures I had as a kid. With Disney promising to resurrect the Star Wars franchise with new movies in the theater starting in 2015, I can't wait to take my boys to see their first Star Wars movie in a theater, overseas, the same place I did over three decades ago. 

Returning to this same base is poetic for me, and I can't help but think it's not coincidence.  God has a way of providing in big and small ways, and in this case, a pretty cool way.  Keep us in your prayers as we begin preparations for the "return" to Alconbury!

Abiding

The last couple of weeks my stress level started creeping up.  How are we going to fundraise this amount? How are we going to see all the family we want to before we leave? How are we going to finish all these house projects to get it ready to sell?  How do we decide what to sell, give away, store, and pack to take with us?  The to-do list can be overwhelming, and time is not slowing down.

And with that, this Tuesday I went to a Bible study where the teacher (a fellow youth minister friend of mine) spoke on John 15: Abiding in Christ.  It's something I've taught and even preached on, and yet God used it afresh to remind me: "I am the true vine, and my Father is the vinedresser."  He is in control, provides, and nurtures; there's no need for me to worry.  "Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing."  Pretty straightforward: if I'm trying to do all of these things in my own wisdom and strength, it's going to be pretty discouraging.

In his commentary on John, Dale Bruner expounds upon "abiding in Christ" in chapter 15 as "making our home in Christ."  Resting in him.  Feeling comfortable and restored by him.   As we are in the process of uprooting one home and starting to establish another, I am reminded that my part is simply to make my home in him, and he will provide.

More Celebration!

As Chris returns from a wonderful week at camp with our Thomas County kids, I am excited to see before me a growing (and more organized) garage sale pile and all four family passports in my hands!  Praise God!

As for our fundraising progress, I am updating the charts at the right every few days...

Celebrating the Small Things

Sometimes you just want to rejoice in small things: simple blessings, achievements, or ways you've seen God move... So for this week:

- Finally got my car clean after months of not doing so...
- Got to share about calling and upcoming adventure with a second church...
- Though only having 7 kids a week ago signed up for my last Crooked Creek Ranch trip, we are now up to 18...
- Had a delicious key lime & vanilla frozen yogurt at Yoburst (with pecans & chocolate chips on it... wow, SO good)...

AND the biggest one:

- As of this week, we have reached 50% of our total funding needed to raise!  (Woo-hoo!)

We thank God for all of you who have given and pledged gifts for the next three years. Thank you everyone for joining us on this adventure!  Keep checking back for more detailed updates...  And we thank you for believing in our calling and this mission field!

The Big Kick-off

I love the beginning of any big college football game when the home team fans have the big chant they all say together right before, during, and after the ball is kicked off.

This blog has none of that fanfare.

But it feels like the start of a big game for us.  We're moving overseas... after ten years of ministry in Thomas County.... to where, we don't know yet... and we're having another baby.
Did we see these things coming?  Nope.  But that's what following Jesus is like sometimes: he takes us places that are totally unexpected.

So as we feel like we're kicking off for our big game, we know if you're bothering to read this, you're probably in the stands as a fan, cheering us on.  Our hope is that this blog can serve as commentators on the game... a glimpse of what's happening on the sidelines.... a chance to hear what the coach is telling the players.... a way for you to know what's going on in the game and feel like you're a part of it.

How often will we update this blog?  Ain't no tellin'.  This is a first-time attempt for us.  My hopes are: often enough to let you know what's up, and not too often as to give you too much to read.

What will be put in this blog?  Some facts.  Some reflections.  Some dreams.  Some prayer requests.  Some humor.  So basically, a taste of everything.

Kinda like a game-day hot dog with everything on it. 

So with that...   "Gooooooooooo JACKETS! Sting 'em!  bzzzzzz"....

(Yes, I had to get my alma mater shout-out in there.)